Mastering the Mouthpiece

Last time, we learnt that not only can you fill a water pipe with fruit punch and Gatorade, you can also fill it with, shock, horror, water! Using water in a bong is the best way to ensure that you get a cool, smooth bong rip, and using water pipes are the best way for asthma sufferers to enjoy weed. So now we know what we can fill our bongs with, how exactly do we use it? How does the glorious milky white smoke get from inside the bong to our insides?

To find out, today’s lesson is all about mastering the mouthpiece.

Where is the mouthpiece on a bong?

MPCollage

Mouthpieces are typically found at the top of a bong. On a traditional straight tube water pipe, they’re found at the pinnacle of the tube, and on angled bongs they’re found on a branch, curved upwards, away from the chamber. As you can see from the collage above, there’s a huge variety of different designs when it comes to mouthpieces, some look like flared holes, others look like trumpet mouthpieces and occasionally, on the more elaborate dab rigs, they look… Well, completely crazy!

Does it matter what style mouthpiece I get?

Yes and no.

On the whole, no, it doesn’t matter what the design of your mouthpiece is, what matters, though, is whether you’ll feel comfortable using it every day or not. And this is where the yes part of our answer comes in.

It does matter if you can’t easily fit your mouth around the hole, and it does matter if you have to contort your mouth in such a way that continual use of your bong makes your lips and cheeks ache. To be able to draw a nice, big, smooth hit, your mouth needs to make a perfect seal around the mouthpiece, if the mouthpiece is too wide or is too uncomfortable to use, you’re not going to be able to do that, and you need to be able to do that to create suction.

When the bowl is lit, you place your mouth over the mouthpiece and inhale. The suction you’re creating, through the mouthpiece, causes the water level in the bong chamber to rise, and the water in the down stem to fall. Air from the down stem diffuses the water with bubbles, and the smoke passes through the water, which in turn cools and filters it. Once the chamber is filled with a beautiful, milky white smoke, you either whip the flower bowl out, or you take your thumb off the shotgun (the shotgun, also known as the carb, is a small hole in the bong that whilst in use is covered, until the point where you decide you want to inhale), and when you do that, the smoke shoots up into your mouth and is cleared into your lungs. Once in the lungs, the active chemicals in the smoke are absorbed directly into your bloodstream.

BONGGIF

This amazing process can’t happen unless you have a good quality mouthpiece.

What is the ideal size for a good mouthpiece?

On the whole, a good mouthpiece will be no more than 2 inches wide, but again, it’s really down to your own personal tastes, the size of your mouth, and your comfort levels.

If I’ve fallen in love with a bong, and the only part I don’t like is the mouthpiece, is there something I can do to change it?

Yes.

For the straight tube pipe, you can buy something like this.

420-GLASS

It’s a dishwasher-safe mouthpiece that’s durable, portable and can even be customised with your own logo if you have one! These medical, grade-A, platinum-cured mouthpieces are brilliant at making an uncomfortably wide mouthpiece smaller, which gives you the air-tight seal needed to get better suction, and they’ve also been designed to prevent the spread of germs, which comes in very handy if you take this awesome accessory along with your awesome new bong to your next Stoner Circle.

For a lot of custom bongs and dab rigs, the mouthpieces are accessories themselves, they’re usually removable and interchangeable, so if you’re not entirely happy with the mouthpiece which came with your bong, you can buy one that suits your needs better. Just remember to purchase a mouthpiece with the correct gendered joint!

Does the mouthpiece make that much of a difference?

Yes.

As we’ve explained, a mouthpiece that’s too wide or is too troublesome to use will neither give you the required suction you need to experience a great hit nor will it be gentle on your mouth, lips and cheeks. So buying a bong with a mouthpiece you’re going to find comfortable to use every day is essential to making your smoking sessions a whole lot better.

A mouthpiece also makes a huge difference because it’s the part which comes directly into contact with germs. If your mouthpiece isn’t kept clean and disinfected, you run the risk of ruining a great smoking session by catching the plague… Wait, we mean bong flu, ah whatever, they’re pretty much the same thing.

Our advice?  Don’t let the funky designs and aesthetics of a mouthpiece get in the way of you enjoying your bong, if you don’t like what your water pipe came with, buy a mouthpiece accessory which you’ll find more convenient and pleasurable to use. Also, make sure to keep it squeaky clean, don’t let germs get in the way of having a happy and healthy smoking experience.

In our next lesson, we’ll be “Checking out Chambers.” Class dismissed!